When I wake up in the night, to let a dog out or get a glass of water or go to the bathroom, I always say something to Krissy. Just an "I love you" or "sweet dreams", just a little something. And she does this thing, she SINGS in her sleep. I mostly can't tell what song it is because sleep singing is about as comprehensible as sleep talking, meaning not at all, but it's clearly singing. I keep threatening to record the little songs to prove to her that she actually does this. Last night she mumbled a little song and then told me that she loved me in that half asleep way that people have when you talk to them in the middle of the night. There's something wonderful about being so loved that when you only barely wake the person up their first words are "I love you". I have an amazing life with this amazing person.

One of the biggest benefits of going out of town for a weekend is getting to come back home at the end and have slightly new eyes. We had a ninja house/animal sitter who left no sign at all behind that someone else had  been here in our house, other than that the animals weren't starving and nothing had been destroyed by them while we were gone. I even looked in the trash, nothing. She must be some kind of covert ops person just moonlighting as a zoo keeper. 

I love the animals we live with almost beyond words. In some ways I know that they know the world and their own existence more immediately than I know those things. They don't question things so much, they don't second guess themselves, there is this kind of purity to them. Animals that aren't domesticated have even more of this quality of being just present and unapologetic. Oh, ours have been trained somewhat and they do try to please us and to live cooperatively - at least a little - but it's a deal we've worked out with them. They don't come up with this stuff on their own. Left to their own devices they would eat our furniture and our shoes and roll in the dirt before sleeping in our bed and chewing on the pillows. We had to strike some deals.

I think it's strange that we can talk about sex, we can gossip about the most intimate details of our lives, we can reveal all our quirks and eccentricities, but talking about money is taboo. Money is dirty talk. The company I work for has a policy that we aren't allowed to discuss our pay with co-workers, even though this is illegal in the US. (Well, technically, you're allowed to threaten to fire people for disclosing their pay, just not to actually fire them for that...) In the past I've had several situations where I hired people and decided what they would be paid and one situation where I knew what co-workers were being paid and knew that it wasn't working out right for them. In every situation I acted in favor of transparency. I never had any problem telling someone why another person got paid more or less than them. No one ever got mad at me for going to management and saying "so and so isn't being paid what they were promised, can you fix that?", even though it meant I obviously knew what people were being paid.  But it's an exercise in swimming against the current and I wonder why that is so.

I can't stop watching this. I think it's one of the funniest things in the universe. I woke up last night hearing the (improved) lyrics in my sleep. Please, someone else watch and spread the dysfunction around...it's just too much for me to handle on my own, I need help.

I do not believe there's a "should" for my whole life, something I'm supposed to be or do, a quest. I don't even understand the idea of that. If there is, I don't want to know what it is ahead of time. Just surprise me.

Mismatched socks, geek-girl glasses, and oh my, the hair - think finger in an electrical outlet hair style, no combing or brushing allowed. Very tall, you might need stilts. Earth shoes - the only kind of shoes I wear when my feet aren't bare. Brown and green clothes mostly. Carry a book and a camera wherever you go. Paint and dirt on clothes and hands most of the time. Swishy-bouncy walk which Krissy makes fun of sometimes. That should do it.